Wednesday, April 29, 2009

Over The Hill.

I have officially made 50 posts. It feels like I should have made more, as I'd like to have updated this more.  

So it's my last week here and I'm trying to take it all in, but it's hard to realize I won't have the city outside my window for 4 full months.  I like change, but not so much the process of changing. I am too sentimental to just not care.  

Last printing class is on Friday (I just plan on printing fun pictures from Coney), then Noah & The Whale that night, followed by a Yankees game at the new stadium, then my parents come on Sunday.  I remember the car ride here so vividly that it feels like yesterday, but I'm going home with so much more than I could have imagined. And I like it. 

"To go from this to the world of 'grown-up' reality.  To feel the tender skin of sensitive child-fingers thickening to feel the sex...To feel the sex organs develop and call loud to the flesh; to become aware of school, exams (the very words as unlovely as the sound of chalk shrilling on the blackboard), bread and butter, marriage, sex, compatibility, war, economics, death, and self. What a pathetic blighting of the beauty and reality of childhood.  Not to be sentimental, as I sound, but why the hell are we conditioned into the smooth strawberry-and-cream Mother-Goose-world, Alice-in-Wonderland fable, only to be broken on the wheel as we grow older and become aware of ourselves as individuals with a dull responsibility in life? To learn snide and smutty meanings of words you once lived, like 'fairy'?...To be aware you must compete somehow, and yet that wealth and beauty are not in your realm..To learn that you might have been more of an artist than you are if you had been born into a family of wealthy intellectuals."

-from The Journals of Sylvia Plath. 
Nichole read that to us the other day, and it all made perfect sense.  

Sunday, April 26, 2009

Monsieur Soleil.

More pictures to come, have to get them developed tomorrow.  

I can't believe I only have one week left here in New York.

I also just watched Grey Gardens, the HBO movie.  The whole time I felt like I was missing some key information about why these two women were so important, yet apparently not.  I found it extremely sad, but supposedly it was supposed to be uplifting, with the tag line "True glamour never fades."  I'll be needing to see the 1976 documentary (ranked #2 in the top 100 20th century documentaries) to make any further judgments.  


Saturday, April 25, 2009

Aesthetic Pleasure.

"When you're walking downtown 
Do you wish I was there 
Do you wish it was me 
With the windows clear and the mannequins eyes 
Do they all look like mine 

You know you could 
I wish you would 
Come pick me up 
Take me out 
Fuck me up 
Steal my records 
Screw all my friends behind my back 
With a smile on your face 
And then do it again 
I wish you would"

How Are Things On The West Coast?

I wish I was at Coachella this year.  These pictures by Hedi Slimane make it seem so intimate and fun.  One of these years I will finally get over to California and hang out in the desert for Coachella.

Until then I'll settle for hot afternoons in Central Park listening to music.  Lucky for me tomorrow it's going to be in the 80's here in New York City.  Time for Coney Island.

Here's to the last week of school spent in Manhattan.


Vital Information For Your Everyday Life.


Came across a picture of young Martin Scorcese and couldn't help but notice the odd resemblance to Bob Saget...or should I be saying Bob Saget's resemblance to Martin Scorcese?

Thursday, April 23, 2009

new header, again.

i liked it better. reminds me of summer.


I'm all over the place today.  This post is quite telling of that. 

"I saw myself sitting in the crotch of this fig tree, starving to death, just because I couldn't make up my mind which of the figs I would choose.  I wanted each and every one of them, but choosing one meant losing all the rest, and, as I sat there, unable to decide, the figs began to wrinkle and go black, and one by one, they plopped to the ground at my feet."

"I wanted change and excitement and to shoot off in all directions myself, like the colored arrows from a Fourth of July rocket."

"After that--in spite of the Girls Scouts and the piano lessons and the water-color lessons and the dancing lessons and the sailing camp, all of which my mother scrimped to give me, and college, with crewing in the mist before breakfast and blackbottom pies and the little new firecrackers of ideas going off every day--I had never been really happy again."

-favorite quotes from The Bell Jar

top 5 for this week (in no particular order):

1.  American Pie (Don McLean)
Did you write the book of love?
And do you have faith in God above? If the Bible tells you so
Now do you believe in rock n' roll?
Can music save your mortal soul?
And can you teach me how to dance real slow?

2. True Love Way (Kings of Leon)
And we'd be so free
Happy alone
Sharing a smile
So far from home
And we would laugh
Laugh till we cry
Making a song
Making me lie
Happy alone

3. Ask (The Smiths)
Shyness is nice and
Shyness can stop you
From doing all the things in life
You'd like to

(definitely my sophomore year anthem.  always had it stuck in my head during cross country).

4. Adagio (Rachmaninoff) 
..there's no lyrics. they wouldn't do it justice anyways.

5. The Calendar Hung Itself (Bright Eyes)
And I kissed a girl with a broken jaw that her father gave to her. 
She had eyes bright enough to burn me. They reminded me of yours. 
And in a story told she was a little girl in a red-rouge, sun-bruised field 
and there were rows of ripe tomatoes where a secret was concealed. 
And it rose like thunder, clapped under our hands. 
And it stretched for centuries to a diary entry's end where I wrote, 
You make me happy oh!! when skies are gray 
You make me happy oh!! when skies are gray and gray and gray.

(this quote isn't enough, a listen is necessary.  also an anthem from soph year.  i'm feeling pretty nostalgic lately.)

Wednesday, April 22, 2009

I Think I've Been Asleep Most of My Life.

on another note, 11 days left. it's bittersweet.

More Nostalgia.

afternoon drags on and on
movie nights that never end
we can hang out all night long
lay in bed and talk to a good friend
because you only get older and you probably forget what it is like

the university is quiet today
we didn't clean
we just talked in the bathroom
the girl always gets in the way
ruined friendships but others replace them

these opinions are poison
i have been drinking them all of my life
i could never replace you
and i could never forget what its like
step out on a moonlit roof
the radio leads a feel good revolution
cigarettes and my closest friends
i tell myself that i have to remember this
i have to remember this

Tuesday, April 21, 2009

Where I Want to Be.

I want to live here, on the French countryside.
And listen to Vivaldi all day long. 
And hike.

This also put me in the mood to listen to Rachmaninoff's  Symphony No. 2. I love him. I'm adding his biography to my list of summer must reads.  

"Young Rachmaninoff. Note the hands."

"a period of severe depression that lasted three years, during which he wrote virtually no music...1900, Rachmaninoff began a course of autosuggestive therapy with psychologist Nikolai Dahl, himself an amateur musician. Rachmaninoff quickly recovered confidence and overcame his writer's block. A result of these sessions was the composition of Piano Concerto No. 2 (Op. 18, 1900–01), dedicated to Dr. Dahl"

Monday, April 20, 2009

10 Things I Hate About You + Picture Love.

I hate the way you talk to me, 
And the way you cut your hair. 
I hate the way you drive my car,  
I hate it when you stare.  
I hate your big dumb combat boots  
And the way you read my mind.  
I hate you so much it makes me sick, 
It even makes me rhyme. 
I hate the way you’re always right,  
I hate it when you lie.  
I hate it when you make me laugh, 
Even worse when you make me cry  
I hate it when you’re not around, 
And the fact that you didn’t call  
But mostly I hate the way I don’t hate you,  
Not even close… 
Not even a little bit…  
Not even at all.

I love the sound of this rain. and the lightning outside my window. Now I just want thunder.  I miss falling asleep to this as a kid...


lucky for me I'm downloading it now. 

A Serious Addiction.

Asian snack food. 

I never would have seen myself loving these wasabi covered green peas, or spicy hot rice snack mix from Japan.  


now i'm just waiting for my mom to get into the city so we can get real food.  YAY.

Saturday, April 18, 2009

Lazy Days Help Me Through the Hopeless Haze.

Today was such a nice, beautifully unproductive Saturday.

It was 77 degrees.  I felt like I was at the beach, when in reality I was only in Central Park.

I found a bike back home that my mom got for me today, here she is.

I can't wait to ride it to work along the Potomac! 



I love these pictures of Emile Hirsch by Jason Nocito.  

I Also LOVE Emile Hirsch.  

Snuggle Up

Love this book.  So excited to read it again.  And get to talk about it in class.  
I want to go home and read all day!

"I felt my lungs inflate with the onrush of scenery-air, mountains, trees, people. I thought, 'This is what it is to be happy.'"

"One could not even give up hope. The Wind would blow, the sand would settle, and in some unforeseen manner time would bring about a change which could only be terrifying, since it would not be a continuation of the present."

I've decided to take pictures of every new place I go to this Summer.  In an effort to go out and see more since I'll be stuck in Virginia.  


Friday, April 17, 2009


It's official. I'm naming my daughter Clarissa.

Thursday, April 16, 2009

Speaking of Summer.

I can't wait to see this movie.  I've watched the trailer too many times now.

Aside from looking like an awesome movie, the trailer has some awesome music.  The Smiths, Regina Spektor, and a personal fave as of late, Hall & Oates' "You Make My Dreams"

I Want A Break.

from everything.
i just want to go home and sleep. for days. 
and then wake up and read. 
and then travel somewhere new.
and go back to sleep.

oh melancholia.

this window always reminds me of a dream i had when I was like 5 or 6.  I walked out of my room, and in the hallway overlooking this window was my sister, or a person that looked like her, with a crazed appearance and a blank stare sitting in a chair positioned perfectly in the middle of the hall.  The person talked to me, about my sister, but I can barely remember what about.  I know she said that my sister was gone, but never averted her eyes from that window.  I feel like I know that dream version of my sister better than I know my actual sister.  
wow, completely random, but thats all that ever comes to mind when I see that window.  I'm so glad I can remember all of this, most of it at least.